Review: 1 Minute Wonders - Albums Division

CATHERINE JENKINS - THE ULTIMATE COLLECTION
To be honest I am completely and utterly immune to the apparent appeal of Catherine Jenkins. Her participation in the bizarre commercial desire for dull compilations of over-played pop ballads, songs from musicals and opera-lite in a classical (typically soprano) style is at best tiresome and boring and at worst utter trash. Jenkins’ appeal seems to derive from her inoffensive persona, which shepherds grannies and dull mums to buy her records in droves. Her success certainly cannot be put down to her singing ability, which is completely unremarkable and would be put to immense shame if she were ever compared to a real opera singer. This is essentially in-offensive coma music for people who don’t really like or get music generally and are just in want of something to put on in the background instead of Coronation Street. If this sounds like you then you will probably enjoy it. 2/10


JAY-Z - THE BLUEPRINT 3
Jay-Z’s new album demonstrates well a continued softening in attitude of Mr Carter’s music as he gets older. His work has become more accessible and pop-orientated, which far from being a bad thing make this album enjoyably melodic whilst maintaining a distinct edge, much like that of early hip-hop from way back when. The samples in here are particularly great, and with a virtual plethora of stars from the world of hip-hop vying for a space on his new release, the album has a diverse quality that each separate guest star brings. Some are more successful than others - Rihanna’s involvement in the album, for example, could only really be enjoyed by fans of the singer; I personally feel the whiny mediocrities her vocals bring are not a plus. Conversely, Alicia Keys’ involved in The Blueprint 3’s lead single “Empire State of Mind” is fantastic, and this track generally has a real ambiance and personality that makes this one of Jay-Z’s best tracks for a while. So generally a good return from one of the expert rappers and producers in hip-hop. 7/10

One Minute Wonders: Singles Division

Best and worst for week ending 22nd November

Best. Number 11. LADY GAGA - "BAD ROMANCE"
Lady Gaga is curious anomaly as something in the music world that is stupendously popular, yet simultaneously of good quality and intrigue. Her tracks may not exactly contain the most wondrous prose or harmony, but she creates damn good catchy pop, of which "Bad Romance" is yet another example of that special kind of genius that Gaga seems to naturally harbour. The chorus here is yet again a ridiculous earworm, and she also continues to slot in covert self-referencing that only Gaga would have the appealing egotism to throw into the mix. The track has an interesting rhythmic quality and some curious timbres, such as the eerie synthetic harpsichord during the intro and outro, and it also has a vague Latino quality deep within its midst. With a fanatically stylised video sporting a cast worthy of The Mighty Boosh, this is another Gaga gem within the rough that is the top 40.

Worst: Number 31. DAVID GUETTA FT AKON - "SEXY CHICK/BITCH"
Whilst Guetta's popularity seems to swell continuously, his musical merits are still considerably lacking within this release. The timbres that saturate this mix are dull and over-used, whilst Akon's lyrical contributions would appear to have derived from the dawdlings of some mentally defunct, embarrassingly sleazy simpleton who has the vocabulary and charisma of an Indonesian pirate. I additionally do not approve of the manner in which Akon (and indeed the RnB/hip-hop world generally) throws the word bitch around so gratuitously it becomes a pseudonym for women everywhere. It is not ok, it is offensive. Whilst Guetta has personally self-proclaimed his stylistic similarities to uber-producers such as N.E.R.D and Timberland, ultimately this track examples perfectly that Guetta is a DJ, not a producer or a musician, and perhaps he should fuck off back to Ibiza, where his particular brand of nondescript euro dance should remain in full hibernation.

Review: 1 Minute Wonders - Albums Division

FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS - I TOLD YOU I WAS FREAKY
This album has obviously spawned from the second series of the fantastic television programme from HBO, and it is perhaps unnecessary to state that this album is very funny lyrically, full of jokes and belly laughs. But unlike a lot of comedy records The Conchords’ work does not get tiresome after a few listens. The instrumentation is not only competent but also truly listenable, and has added musical references and parodies to keep any muso amused again and again. This album has more musical and conceptual depth than would appear at face value and certainly maintains its own musical merits that are independent of the TV show. The tracks are perhaps not quite as universally strong or catchy as the first album/series, but through continued familiarity with the new stuff, this second album will probably become just as robust a work as previous endeavours.  7/10


THE TEMPER TRAP – CONDITIONS
The Temper Trap fall quite easily within the new wave of electro indie music that is currently very hip and cool. The variety of synth timbres and usage within this new quasi genre is an interesting and refreshing reprise from the guitar-dominated noughties, and is certainly an apparent quality within this début release from the Australians. The instrumentation is rather creative at times, and the production is very tight with some fantastically precise guitar tones especially. The continuous chorus lead vocals do get a bit repetitive at times, however, and the lyrics, especially during chorus sections are at times weak and un-endearingly repetitive. There are some very good, beautiful tracks from this release; “Down River” and “Sweet Disposition” are particularly captivating; but generally this album does fall a little bit short of expectations, containing less intrigue and charisma than many of its new wave counterparts. 5/10

Article: Girls Aloud - A Comment on the Changing Etiquette of Gigs

Reflecting over the past decade, as one does in these situations, it struck me as particularly notable how the general atmosphere and conduct at gigs has changed quite dramatically over the past ten years. Once upon a time in the early noughties, when I was a little wee teenager embarking on my own independent musical life, gigs were generally pretty horrible places to be. They were smelly, sweaty, aggressive, heavy places, in which only the strongest and stubbornest of girlfriends could prevail. Gigs were a serious boy zone, with most of the girls present only being there in order to impress (or keep happy) some current beau.


Spin the clock forward ten years, and gigs are certainly becoming softer places to frequent. When I recall my most recent gigging experience (Passion Pit at the O2 in Oxford last month), the venue was of a far more female friendly orientation. I would say a good third of the audience was female, and a particular thing that got me was how very lovely they were all turned out, with these gorgeously pretty dresses and heels and what not. My exact thoughts before leaving were ‘don’t wanna dress too nice; it is a gig after all. T-shirt and jeans, me thinks’. How very archaic of me. The girls were not the only difference however; the venue too was dramatically different to early gigging experiences. The drink was not just warm lager, and the toilets - my god they had soap and paper and locks and cubicle doors and everything. They were actually nice - even my most girly friends would have found them acceptable. Conversely, at my first gig (the Inner City Sumo Tour featuring A and Goldfinger at Brixton Academy) only one toilet had a door and the walls were nearly black with graffiti. This wasn’t necessarily a problem for me, but for most ladies such an environment is a definite no-no.


So what exactly has changed in the gigging arena over the past ten years to make live music consumption more universal accessible? It cannot simply be that my tastes have changed; whilst there still certainly remains some of the more unappetising gigging experience out there, music venues and the people who go to them have to a notable extent cleaned up their act. Much of this change could certainly be equated with money. Gigging is a seriously big business these days, much bigger than a decade ago. With the massive germination of festival culture in the noughties, through which new festivals spring up every year, live music consumption is no longer a realm purely for musos and teenagers. And because the gigging demographic has changed, the venues and the general atmosphere has too.


But capital cannot take all the credit for this change. In my opinion, the revision of the general etiquette of gigging has in fact derived ultimately from a change in the style of the music itself, which has gone on to affect everything from general accessibility to toilet cleaning rotas. At the beginning of the decade “gigs” were for the most part confined to the rock genre. Obviously big acts and pop stars did tours of giant venues, just like they do today, but popular music was generally dance or garage orientated, which was mostly restricted to clubs and did not typically venture into the live genre but at all. If you liked guitar music, you had to look across the pond to America, which produced an array of masculine orientated, guitar centric rock. This was essentially men’s/boy’s music, and you were specifically branded as a rock-chick/tom-boy if you were a female oriented towards this type of music. Today, whilst there are still influxes of American “rock” which typically takes a masculine stance (albeit often through the well beaten track that is emo, which for all its vulnerability still essentially has a masculine bias), a lot of today’s music has a more multifaceted approach, taking on aspects of indie, pop and electro amongst others. This new wave of popular rock (if you can really classify it as “rock”) is incredibly popular, and as it is diverse in its complexities, from the very poppy Little Boots to the super-electro Max Tundra, there is usually something for all tastes. This diversification and amalgamation of genres inclines towards a softening of rock, which (stereotypically, perhaps) indicates a feminisation of rock. The hard, phallic edge of the rock guitar has been quashed by the more polyphonic, rhythmic, physical nature of electro and pop, therefore making it more female. The most popular gigging music now is our new wave, which is a more balanced, dynamic creature that harbours both masculine and feminine qualities. And clearly, the rise of femininity with music has not been lost by women, who are now flocking to gigs like it’s the new clubbing.